PAM HOCKENBURY

2/10/1945 – 12/6/2023

Earlier this week, Patricia Ann (Pam) Hockenbury (née Mead) passed away peacefully, surrounded by her three children and her dearest friend. She was 78 years old.

Pam, who was born in Port Chester, NY in 1945, grew up primarily in Fall River, MA. She attended Boston College and Cardinal Cushing College in Boston. She was a top student, who went on to get a Master's in Education from Norwich University. Pam moved to Northfield, VT in 1976 when her husband, Ed Hockenbury, became the head men's basketball coach at Norwich. She became a beloved English Teacher at Northfield High School, where she shared her love of literature, taught her students to write with skill and creativity, and above all, made every student feel loved for over 20 years. Her teaching extended beyond the Northfield classroom walls to the Norwich community, where she helped many basketball players write countless essays, often late into the night sitting at her kitchen table.

Pam loved her job and her community, and she also instilled many life lessons in the people whose lives she touched. Above all, Pam would tell you to be kind. In fact, her favorite phrase was "be kind to all", and she modeled kindness in everything she did. While being kind was her cornerstone in life, she lived by some other personal beliefs that she would want us to share. Pam would tell you to always somersault head first into the waves, nose plugged. Don't hesitate to ask personal questions, even if it's a complete stranger; more often than not you will make a new friend, or at the very least make someone smile. Never leave the house without your pink lipstick on. Bag balm cures any topical illness, and vaseline prevents aging. Offer to help others; even when you have Alzheimer's Disease and can't remember who you are helping, never stop offering. Everything's better with maple syrup, and White Zinfandel and Wise potato chips are a perfect pairing. It's ok to tell your grandchildren some white lies, as long as they are interesting. Send cards, for whatever reason, and don't just sign them - write something beautiful, loving and sincere, and when you receive cards, save them in a box labeled "treasures." Read even when you can't remember what you just read, and carry a book with you everywhere. Appreciate the beauty of nature, even "stick season" in Vermont. Tell your loved ones about the marshes and gray skies even if they don't see the beauty. Bring shells and rocks home; paint them and give them to your family. They will become your treasures. Feed the multitudes. If one more basketball player or coach shows up for dinner, cut the steak thinner. Hug freely and often, face masks be damned.

Above all that Pam cherished in her life - friends, nature, music, walks and books - the thing she cherished the most was her family. She was an adoring, wonderful mother to Christine, Eddie and Amy, and her second son, nephew Frank, and a loving wife to her soulmate and best friend, Ed Hockenbury (deceased). Her grandchildren were treasured and spoiled! Her bond with each of them uniquely showed how she recognized and loved them for their individual personalities and interests. Michael Cirelli and great granddaughter Giuliana Cirelli, Mary Kate Drury, Eddie, Ryan and Casey Hockenbury, and Nicholas, Samuel and Maxwell Phillippo. Pam was more than a mother-in-law to Tony Cirelli, Stephanie Hockenbury, and Matt Phillippo. Their relationships were filled with dancing, laughter, dirty jokes, mutual respect, and a deep love. Pam adored her siblings, Arthur and Peter (deceased) Mead, and Susan Mead Haley, who were her first friends and with whom she maintained a close bond throughout her life.

Family, friends and members of the community are invited to come remember Pam, and celebrate the richness and fullness of the life she lived, at a Memorial Mass at St. Paul's Episcopal Cathedral, 2 Cherry St., Burlington, VT, on Saturday, December 30, 2023 at 11:00 a.m. All who attend the service, along with those who are unable to join us at church, are encouraged to visit with Pam's family and friends after the service, from 1:00-4:00pm in a celebration of her life at the Atrium, DoubleTree by Hilton Burlington, 870 Williston Rd. in South Burlington.

In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made in her name to UVM Health Network Home Health & Hospice whom the family thanks for the wonderful care they took of Pam, https://www.uvmhomehealth.org/donate/make-an-online-donation/.

Pam also donated to Vermont Public Radio, https://donate.vermontpublic.org/page/60610/donate/1?utm_source=website&utm_medium=vanity_url&utm_campaign=2023_decemberdrive). Please also know that for Pam, a simple act of kindness is a gift in her memory.